Sunday, November 21, 2010

My Sister-in-Law

 O My Soul:

I knew she was struggling with minor forms of depression.  Then I knew it was getting worse and the medications were increased and then she was not responding well to any medication or other help.

Today I learn she has been on medical leave from work for the last several weeks and in a very special program at the hospital.  This large and reputable hospital takes only three cases per month and my sister-in-law was accepted.

A major part of the treatment is electroshock therapy, plus a lot of other care.  She is able to stay at home, but things are very hard for her and her family.

My brother-in-law is hopeful.  He has seen improvements but it will be around Christmas before the doctors can determine to what extent she has benefited from the program.

I'm experiencing quite a few emotions since I received the news.

Partly, I feel sad.  Such a bright, intelligent, and beautiful person simply racked with tremendous pain.

Partly, I feel scared.  I fear that I may one day be overcome by the same thing.  I'm more hopeful than I have been in the last few years.  But, my fear is that the darkness will return with greater strength as the years and decades progress.  I hope not but...

And partly I feel angry.  I hate this crap.

I thankful for my psychologist, psychiatrist, pastor, and friends, but I remember where I've come from.  I know the difference between a bad day and a disease ridden mind that cannot cope with most situations.

I'm most especially thankful that I have a Savior who was tempted in every way, even forsaken by His Father, but through it all did not despair.  All that He did for me, my sister-in-law, and a great many others.

Thanks be to God.

Hope in Christ &
God bless you.


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